Gobstopper (D4, MA)

[Phoebe Wren]

Phoebe regarded him quietly, letting him take his time to speak his mind, and figure things out for himself.

"Well, I'm no shrink, but... I guess you did what you had to do to cope with your circumstances before. Including not feeling stuff like that. Maybe." She shrugged, waiting to see if he was ready to go again. "I think we can say that for most of us recruits, no? We all have our own coping mechanisms."

[Axel Ward]

Axel's lips twisted. "Who needs a shrink? We're just talking." Axel growled.

He sat up, still breathing heavily. "But what do you mean about the others? And coping?"

[Phoebe Wren]

"Coping mechanisms. It's... shall we say the armor that people put on to deal with difficulties in their lives. Such as trauma, unstable living situations, abuse, and so on." It was a very dumbed down version of it, but she suspected something more complex would fly over his head.

"Like, I don't think you're a guy who at the core is fine with just killing people in cold blood. You wouldn't have said you wanted to get away from that otherwise. You've just built up a good armor against feeling bad about it because it's what you had to do to survive, right? And the rest of us, well, I think everyone of us have gone through similar experiences."

[Axel Ward]

"Huh." Axel grunted. He leaned forward a little, resting his forearms on his knees. "I guess that makes sense. So it's not that we don't care about stuff, it's that we... guard against caring or something, until we can deal with it. Or something."

He glanced at her, almost smiling. "Sure sounds a lot better than just not giving a damn about killing people."

[Phoebe Wren]

"Well, yeah. Sure, there's some people who just are incapable of it, but like I said, they wouldn't have made the decision you did in trying to be better." Which was the simple explanation she'd go with for now.

"As Mandalorians, killing isn't something we can shy away from. But there's a difference in defeating a worthy foe in honorable combat, and an execution."

[Axel Ward]

"So that's how it is for Mandalorians, huh? And I guess I'm trying to be a Mandalorian." Axel grunted. "Guess that means I should try to do that."

He frowned. "Seems like Mandalorians haven't always made that distinction. In the past, I mean. Sometimes they killed people who didn't deserve it. But not always." He shrugged. "I guess things change."

[Phoebe Wren]

"Things change. People change. And not all those who call themselves Mandalorian are honorable," she said simply, but with a noticable tension in her voice.

[Axel Ward]

Axel was actually pretty good at noticing things like that.

"Oh?" He asked. "What d'you mean?" He shifted a little, starting to rise, but settled back down. This seemed more important.

[Phoebe Wren]

"You do know that there was like a civil war, right? For Mandalorians?" she looked at him questioningly. "A couple of years ago, that is. There's been a few throughout history."

[Axel Ward]

Axel shrugged. "Yeah, I know it happened. I don't know why."

He chuckled. "I'm reading about Mandalorian stuff, but I haven't even gotten to this millennium yet."

[Phoebe Wren]

"Well, long story short, there were wrong sides and right sides to be on. Those on the wrong side have that shame over their head." Judging by her tone, it didn't seem like a subject she was too keen on opening up about fully.

[Axel Ward]

Axel looked at her a long moment before nodding. "Okay."

Again, Axel started to rise, but looked back at Phoebe. "So... if someone does have a shame like that... how do they get rid of it?" His dark eyes seemed even darker than usual. And more searching. Perhaps he and she had more in common than he'd thought.

[Phoebe Wren]

She took a deep breath at that question, then exhaled slowly. "It's... there's no recipe on how to do it, and it's different for everyone."

It wasn't exactly something that had one easy answer or solution. "I think that if someone can prove to be better, to be proper Mando'ade, that should matter more than any past shame." Phoebe knew Axel had been through the rough life, so she gave him a questioning look now.

[Axel Ward]

Axel's look was just as questioning as Phoebe's. Had she been in the civil war herself? She would have been so young... but war didn't always distinguish between child and adult.

"There are worse people to do that with than the Laerrins." He said. "So... I guess we'll just have to do our best."

He gave her a nod, and one of his almost-smiles, just a little quirk at the corners of his lips. "Wanna help me out on some of the other weights? I'm not done yet."

[Phoebe Wren]

She nodded, her gaze downward as it seemed there was something on her mind that was left unspoken.

At the near-smile, Phoebe chuckled and gave a half-smile. "Yeah, sure. Gotta keep those muscles of yours in shape, after all. Your head isn't good for much, but at least we got 'em guns." Emphasizing her line, she lifted up her own arms to give him a gun-show.

[Axel Ward]

Axel snorted, eyes narrowing as he appraised her, err, armaments. "Not bad, Wren. Not bad. And yeah, even if my head's not good for much, I've got this goin' on." He turned, bending and angling his body to flex bicep and shoulder of one arm at the same time. It bulged impressively.

He smirked. "Sure you don't wanna take a turn? Maybe we can get you caught up to me. After all, I'm workin' on this." He tapped his forehead. "Been hitting the datapad pretty hard lately."

[Phoebe Wren]

Now it was Phoebe's turn to snort, with exaggeration and all. "Heh, just so you know, I can match you if need be. I got some tricks up my sleeves, mate."

But at least the impressive show got a grin. "But sure, I'll give it a turn. Show you I ain't just a fluffy bunny."

[Axel Ward]

Axel chuckled. "Yeah, is that how it is? Alright, Wren. I wouldn't mind seeing your tricks one of these days."

Grunting, he rose to his feet. He took a moment to wipe down the bench before stepping out of the way, of course; that was only polite.

He gave her a somewhat encouraging nod as he moved to stand at the head of the bench. "But first, c'mon, let's see what you've got." The words came with another half-smile; seemed like Axel was being generous with them.

[Phoebe Wren]

"Aight," dusting her hands off to show she meant business, it was time to get the show on the road. The bench looked small underneath a frame like Axel's, so in comparison, Phoebe looked more like a kid trying to mimic her older brother. Not that she was a petite thing in terms of muscles, but she had a much smaller starting point to work with.

"So - were you born this strong, or was it something you decided to become?" she asked, and when Axel was ready, she started on the sets.

[Axel Ward]

"Okay, here we go." Axel said. He gripped the bar in the middle, helping to ease it into Phoebe's hands. Once she had it, he took a tiny step back. His dark eyes narrowed as he watched her work out, ready to help when she needed it.

"Mmm. Don't know if I'd say decided, but it was a little of both." Still watching, Axel shrugged. "I was always a bit big for my age. But..." He frowned. "I'd say it was more 'had to' than decided. Ord Mantell's a pretty rough place. And I had to look out for myself."